Moan, moan, moan----get it off your chest or have a chat

[Michael J Campbell]

My usual path for walking the dog takes past a doctors house with a nice big garden. Today he had employed a landscape company to trim the hedges and tidy up for the winter,and they did just that. All the hedges were neatly trimmed and all the shrubs in the shrub border were trimmed into nice round balls, squares, or rectangles, according to the size of the plants. Now! why was I never taught how to do that when I was getting my horticultural training? Maybe it is the Space age or the computer age and I have been left behind.

[Maggi Young]

O, my goodness, Michael, how horrible! I know exactly what you mean by this type of "pruning"... it is increasingly seen here too... it is just awful.....taes no account of the grwoth/flowering patterns of the plants at all... it is an abomination and no mistake.....what I have discovered, and what makes it even worse in my mind. is that the term for this method of plant massacre  and butchery is " cloud pruning" ..... I ask you!??!! Never heard such rubbish!
I do know about "real cloud prunig... it produces the wonderful effects of great age and beauty in bonsai trees, and has been carefully practised for centuries by genuine gardeners who understand their plants.........AAARRGHH!  I have every sympathy for your distress in seeing this travesty and applaud your humour in telling us about it!!

[Maggi Young]

By the way, if the daft new  "pruning" methods described above by Michael don't upset you enough, I hope you have noted Fred's post in the Members' section, regarding the likely "Down-time" tomorrow of the Forum: this is to allow a change to a new server.... in an attempt to get the Forum working at a proper speed and efficinecy once more. Fred wrote in  : Up And Running Again on: Today at 04:59:29 PM  Last post by admin 
"Please note that the forum will likely go down tomorrow (30th Oct) around 11 AM and won't be back on  until evening."

So, don't panic if you can't get your forum fix for a few hours..... it will all be worth it in the end 

Perhaps the weather will be warm and dry and we can enjoy some time out in the garden......

[Michael J Campbell]

Maggi,cloud pruning sounds about right,whoever thought up that idea had their head well and truly in the clouds. Probably cloud cuckoo land.

[Maggi Young]

Maggi,cloud pruning sounds about right,whoever thought up that idea had their head well and truly in the clouds. Probably cloud cuckoo land.

Yup, that's about it!
Can't belive how ugly this effect is....... I wonder if they think it's a modern take on topiary for the masses??!!

[Michael J Campbell]

Maggi, I have just thought of a good business idea,the perfect no maintenance garden for people who like those little clipped buns in their garden. Make those square,round, and rectangle shrubs from recycled plastic and plant them in the garden. Then they could set them in concrete and cover that with grit. Hey presto, no maintenance. The rain would wash the plants and keep them clean and fresh looking and no need to hire a landscape contractor to do the pruning.
I might mention it to the Doctor tomorrow on my past. I will hide the dog just in case.

[Michael J Campbell]

Could even make some with flowers on them, for the people who want a plant that flowers all year with no maintenance.You know the  type. I am sure you have been asked for those many times.

[mark smyth]

What a coincidence ... I spoke to the local Housing Executive about this on Monday. They are spending £1000s greening Antrim's housing areas. Last week all the shrubberies in my town were butchered by a landscaping company who came in with, and I quote, "the lowest price for the job". They whacked back roses, Forsythia, forest flames, sarcocca, spotted laurels, rhododendrons ..... and the list goes on. He said to me "what would you have me do?" I suggested for the possible 10s of thousands they spend annually they should employ a real gardener and a small team. His reply was they arent taking on anymore staff! He did tell me the budget for the next 5 years for plants is huge and most will be spent on bulbs and specimen trees to stop vandals uprooting them. My answer was how long will these trees take to root, will you stake them properly and who will water them? They will be staked using two posts and a cross bar, not watered. I suggested species bulbs/corms that should be grass that is left uncut for at least 6 weeks. He said he has to buy from the cheapest source and to cut his grass. I suggested I would give him free advice and he asked if I had a degree in horticulture.

[Lesley Cox]

Perhaps the doctor is a frustrated topiarist?

Maggi, at 9.30am Thursday (probably 8.30pm Tues to you) the Forum's wording just fine. Maybe it's tonight there will be problems (for us down under).

[Lesley Cox]

Michael, what do you think the doctor might do to your dog? I admit Roger has been clipping our dog severely over recent days when he (the dog) will let him, but he (Roger) has still managed to retain the basic dog shape underneath.

[Anthony Darby]

Save all that carbon dioxide pollution these trees and bushes produce at night. Wasn't it Ronald Reagan who suggested that trees cause more pollution in America than cars? My goodness that man was a genious! The thickness of two short planks comes to mind.

[Maggi Young]

Only two, Anthony??

In some areas of town the grass is being left to grow because of council cutbacks... this has resulted in lovely areas with tall ( up to two feet (60cms) grasses which  are really very attractive.... there have been HUGE complaints from people who say they can't walk their dogs through it and the kids can't play in it....what utter tosh! I don't know any dog or child who wouldn't enjoy playing in such a meadow...

Elsewhere in town there are petitions to have street trees cut down because their roots are causing the pavements to rise ......if sensible types of tree had been planted in the first place it wouldn't be an issue.
In a street near us, young Cotoneaster trees have been planted at intervals all along the road....they are staked and surrounded by a sturdy weld-mesh cage to a height of about 165 cms ( around 5ft 6 inches or so)..........every week another one or two has had its top broken off at the height of the mesh...some little scruffbag is coming along and snapping them off. Some nights he either has a chum with him, or he has had extra vitamins that day, because he snaps more than one.....whole neighbourhood would like to get their hands on the little ratbag.......and, yes, I would put money on it being a "him" .....sue me, why dontcha!

[Anthony Darby]

I with you Maggi. I would coat the trees in a mixture of axle grease and broken glass with a touch of something evil smelling and bacterialogically rich in it. If that didn't cure them it would......?

[ChrisB]

On the subject of vandalism, our village has had trouble all summer with a vandal who systematically pulled out all the decent plants from our public planters on Friday nights.  We speculated on visitors to the prison, kids and so on.  We even started to think of having someone out there on Friday nights to find out who it was.  After some time we found out it was a bloke in the next village who was not very bright, who was selling them to make money to go down the local pub.  Everything is now lovely again....

[gote]

If you need a perfect lawn, Green concrete or tarmac is the answer. 
It will also fit the council's budget for upkeep

I recall newly planted trees in Tokyo. They were staked with four sturdy inwards sloping poles connected by a sturdy square. (I cannot find the picture now). I have also seen gardeners prune pine trees in the Himejii castle garden. They had spread a tarpaulin on the ground and were sitting two meters above ground taking out the top party of this years shoots leaving a limited number of needles. Of course this is the homeland of bonsai.

A friend of mine (who sometimes posts on the forums) had a 2m magnolia stolen a couple of years ago. The late Hepatica expert Severin Schlyter once found his stolen hepaticas for sale but could not prove that they were his. I never show my garden to groups. There is usually a thief amongst them. 

Göte